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20121005
20121005
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Comedy Central
Oct 5, 2012 10:30am PDT
debated clint eastwood. (laughter) meanwhile-- (cheers and applause) meanwhile, romney was the alpha mitt, slapping obama around. and, anyone else who got in mitt away. >> i'm sorry, jim, i'm going to stop the subsidy to pbs. i will stop other things. i like pbs. i like big bird, i actually like you too. but i'm not going to keep on spending money for things to borrow from china to pay for it. >> stephen: he just told the moderator who works at pbs, i'm going to throw your ass out on the street, old man! you-- (cheers and applause) you, not only you-- but all those freeloading muppets. that takes not just one ball, but two, two enormous balls! (applause) but, folks, as much as i enjoyed the triumph of the willard, what i loved most was the heartwarming pant crapping over at msnbc. >> i was disappointed in the president. i thought he was off his game. i was absolutely stunned tonight. >> there wasn't, i don't think, a single direct attack against mr. romney from president obama. no discussion of the 47%. >> at all. >> no discussion of immigration. no discussion of union rights. no discussi
Comedy Central
Oct 4, 2012 7:00pm PDT
, bottom line, these meaningless, useless debates are crucial. especially for the romney campaign. >> the romney campaign looks at this as very, very important tonight, they recognize this is the biggest opportunity for him to introduce himself to the country. they don't know hillary. this is the time for him to introduce himself. people don't know mitt romney. and we live in a very distracted age where everybody has ipads, ipods, blueberries, they have stuff in their ear. >> oh, i'm sorry. i'm sorry. all right. all right. .. >> all right. what is that? what is that? yeah, no. hold on. can you hold on? i have another call. hold on. hello? hello? yes? uh-huh. uh-huh. you have got what? i have got -- i have got a what in my ear? you have to speak up yavment hear you i have a banana in my ear. hmm, hmm, hmm. >> that got in there. >> i will call you back. but papa bear has got a point. these electronic gadgets that we all have now -- they give us -- they give us information 24/7, no matter where we are, and it has made it impossible for us to know who this guy is. i want to say let's -- anywa
Comedy Central
Oct 5, 2012 1:30am PDT
) folks, i am not surprised that romney crushed it. because this debate was right in his wheelhouse. soul-crushing. in fact, it was so tedious i think man in the front row fell asleep. (laughter) the first half hour, the first half hour, folks. (applause) the first half hour was an or geoof tax policy minutish-- orgy was tax policy minutia, and they moved on to the intricacies of medicare solvency it was off the hook, in that it would have been more interesting to listen to a dial tone. (laughter) but however wonky it got last night there was no miss tacking that there was a fire breathing leftie on that stage spewing heated socialist rhetoric. >> i will not reduce the taxes paid by high income americans. regulation is essential. you can't have a free market work if you don't have regulation. preexisting conditions are covered under my plan. and with regards to health care wa, we did in massachusetts is a model for the nation, state-by-state. >> stephen: yes, mitt romney's health-care plan is just like his positions, the details change state-by-state. (laughter) now-- folks, you kno
Comedy Central
Oct 4, 2012 11:30pm PDT
how great an achievement it was. before the debate, mitt's campaign said romney will come across as empathetic. but here's what mitt has been promising for the last two years. >> tax cuts for the wealthiest americans. how do you make that seem warm and fuzzy? well, you just need to shake it up as hard as mitt did last night. >> so-- give it a shot. okay. (laughter) (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) now let's see what mitt's tax plan looks like now. okay? just need to get my tool here. okay. here we go. (cheers and applause) presto changeo. (laughter) now you see romney's policies, now you don't. we'll be right back. >> welcome back, everybody. thank you so much. folks, if you watch the show you know that i have been fighting all year to stamp out voter fraud. because if even one fraud center shows up at the polls in november that would tarnish the integrity of an election that the koch brothers paid good money for. that's why tonight i have two colbert voter fraud alerts. first up first up my source tell me that just six days before the election millions of americans are p
Search Results 0 to 3 of about 4